tumblr has given me the ability to laugh at the stupidest shit in the world
in my head
with a straight face.
80% exhaustion 10% sarcasm 20% dont care
that’s 110 percent
20% of me doesn’t care
can someone stay up with me till 2am and tell me everything they have ever been too scared to say
when i say peeka you say boo
peeka
chu
shut the fuck up
*walks onto a crime scene*
swiggity swag who’s in the bag
(Source: islifeworthliving)
people who say hot cocoa instead of hot chocolate make me uncomfortable
some guy just called my number thinking i was a male prostitute, and he started talking to me about how much he could pay me so i pulled up gunshot noises on my computer and started screaming and he panicked and hung up
911 jUST FFUCKING CALLLLED ME IA AMC LAUGHHING SO HARD I TOLD THEM THE SITUEATION AND I’M STULL FUCMKING LAUGHING BECUASE NO W HTE’YRE TRACING THE GUY TO ARREST HIM FOR TRYING TO SOLICITEA ND PAY FOR SEX
I’VE DONE A GOOD
I’m here to buy pineapple mugs and shirts, you judgmental bastard.
